which office character are you?

I'm Stanley

They’re some of the most dysfunctional characters on TV. But, admit it: you identify with at least one ...

1. What is the favourite thing about your job?
A. I am usually the centre of attention.
B. I get to pull pranks on my co-workers.
C. I get to keep a vast collection of bobblehead dolls on my desk.
D. I look forward to my office’s annual “free pretzel day.”
E. I’m head of the accounting department.

2. What is your best quality/skill?
A. I consider myself a friend first, and a boss second.
B. I can type 90 words a minute.
C. I’m the company’s top salesman.
D. I’m serious and hard-working but I’m seriously underpaid.
E. As a former child beauty pageant contestant, I enjoy being judged.

3. What is your worst quality/skill?
A. I have a tendency to reveal personal information about my staff.
B. I sometimes get too close to my co-workers.
C. I lack basic social skills and common sense.
D. I find it extremely difficult to hide my disdain and disrespect for my boss.
E. I am cold, judgmental and uptight.

4. Which best describes the car you drive?
A. Chrysler Sebring convertible
B. Toyota Yaris hatchback
C. Pontiac Trans Am
D. Chrysler 300
E. Ford Focus

5. What do you find embarassing about yourself that you wouldn’t want anyone else to find out?
A. I burned my foot in a George Foreman grill.
B. I was banned from a major restaurant chain because I was drunk and stole drinks from other people’s tables.
C. I wear a Casio calculator watch.
D. My daughter once flirted with the office temp.
E. I wear a children’s size 10.

6. What actor/movie do you love?
A. I idolize Drew Carey and Ryan Stiles.
B. My desert island movie picks are Fargo, Edward Scissorhands, The Breakfast Club, Dazed and Confused and The Princess Bride.
C. My favourite movie is The Crow.
D. I absolutely love Pam Grier.
E. I enjoy the acting of Harry Connick Jr.

7. What’s your favourite food/restaurant?
A. I consider Sbarro fine dining.
B. My favourite yogurt flavor is mixed berry.
C. I like beets.
D. I enjoy a hot, chewy roll of buttered dough.
E. I’m a vegetarian, so vegetables.

8. What would you be doing if you weren’t working at your current job?
A. Hopefully, nothing to do with a pyramid scheme. Maybe improv or stand-up.
B. I’m skilled at drawing… perhaps a career in graphic design.
C. I’m trained in the art of surveillance.
D. I enjoy working on crossword puzzles.
E. I rule the Party Planning Committee with an iron fist, so something along those same lines.

9. What would people be surprised to know about you?
A. I hit an employee with my car.
B. I’ve walked over a bed of hot coals.
C. I have a hidden arsenal of weapons in your desk, including nunchucks, throwing stars, brass knuckles and a boomerang.
D. I like to relax by drinking red wine and watching television mysteries.
E. I think the clothing at Gap Kids too flashy.

10. Who is the most useless person in your office?
A. Definitely our human resources representative. Yuck.
B. My manager.
C. Everyone but me and my manager.
D. My manager.
E. My manager.

If you answered mostly As, you have my apologies, because you are like Michael Scott. You believe you are the office clown, an expert in the business you are in and you think you are every employees’ pal. Unfortunately, you are also socially awkward, insensitive and ignorant and your quest to be liked and look cool comes off as pathetic and desperate.

If you answered mostly Bs, you are most like Pam Beesly, the friendly voice of reason in a sometimes chaotic workplace. The bright spots of your day include pulling practical jokes, playing FreeCell on your computer and making people happy by doing extra, unnecessary work.

If you answered mostly Cs (and I seriously hope you didn’t), you are just like Dwight Schrute, a bizarre, egotistical know-it-all who, ironically enough, happens to be gullible and easily tricked and tormented. You worship your boss, often get involved in his/her schemes and will take any opportunity to gain power and authority.

If you answered mostly Ds, you are exactly like Stanley Hudson: hard-working and serious, yet grumpy and disgruntled. Your boss annoys you, your pay depresses you, and for the most part, you’re laid back… unless something or someone gets you angry, then you become frightening.

If you answered mostly Es, you are just like Angela Martin, uptight, rigid and frown on all the frivolous activity in your workplace. You are an office safety officer, your complaints are infamous with human resources, you’re highly emotional, and no one can do a task better than you.